slacker checking in!

Been way too long since i have checked in here. i always was slack at updating my blog...probably why i stopped doing it for a year or more :)
the kids are just starting their second week of school holidays. so far so good. i have been working here and there so luckily my dad has helped out taking care of them for me. They try his last nerve i am sure but he doesnt complain.
yesterday we went to a local beach with my best friend and her kids. even though it was really cold the kids still swam in the ocean. here i am shivering with two jumpers on and they are swimming!!!! thats kids for you.
We have been doing something most days even if just out for a couple of hours to stop them getting too bored. We went to see Bridge to Terabithia last week and i had forgotten the ending even though i read the book at school..we all liked it even if it ended up quite sad. Riles is keen to see Transformers and Cait and i are going to see The Nancy Drew movie. i remember loving those books as a kid..those and Trixie Belden mysteries were my favourites.
My new gym has been open for a week now and i am loving it..i did 6 classes in the first week so i guess i liked it?????
i did my first spin class yesterday and was nervy about it but it ended up being torture but i loved it. hoping to get back there tonight for another go at it so it mustnt have been too bad. i do know that the seats take some serious getting used to..parts of my anatomy i wont mention are pretty sore today!
i am have some housecleaning to do so i better get to it.
hugs bell

time flies when you are having fun!

I was just reading at a friend's blog and it reminded me that it has been a while since i have updated here. i keep another journal at a diet website so sometimes i forget about updating at both spots :)
Not a lot has been going on in my life since i last updated. we finally got some rain which was a welcome relief even if it did come on the day when Riles class was supposed to go on a field trip. We got 24 hours of solid rain which is the most rain we have had in over 3 years. that goes to show how bad the drought situation is her in Australia at the moment!
i have been feeling yuk the last few days. havent felt up to going to the gym which means that i really must be feeling bad because not much stops me from my gym classes. i ended up going yesterday and doing STEP and made it through the class. i did come home and sleep for 2 hours afterwards though so i think i zapped my energy reserves for sure.
Cait went to a local dance last night with 6 of her friends. she had a ball and danced the night away no doubt. Riles and i went to see the latest Shrek movie and loved it. the Shrek movies are easily my favourite of all the kids movies. i love them, especially because they always have good messages in them about kids loving themselves and accpeting others etc.
I have 4 days at work starting this afternoon. hopefully i can make it through them and that this sick feeling passes soon.
hugs bell :)

autism

Today i happened to be home when Oprah was on. it was strange because i am normally up at the school reading today but wasnt needed as the kids had other stuff on. the show was on Autism- i guess i was supposed to see it as i was home when i normally would not have been.
It was absolutely heart breaking. i cried and sobbed throughout the show. i felt so much empathy for those parents who really only wanted understanding and for people not to judge them or their kids. It made me feel like a fraud in some respects when i am have a bad day and get frustrated and think why me with Riley and his autism. But it gave me some real insight into just how lucky we really are. For the people on this show have so many more trials than me to get through. For many of them their children cannot speak at all, they cannot attend mainstream schools etc.
So much of their feelings however mirrored my own. the part that struck me most was the older brother of an autistic boy. he was 11 and his brother 10. the 11 year old expressed sadness and resentment yet unbelievable loyalty towards his brother. He spoke so eloquently about just wanting to have a " normal" family about not being second all the time after his brother. it struck a chord with my own situation. i worry a lot about how riley's disability limits what we do in some ways about how indeed it is easy to not give cait as much attention as she probably deserves. its never an intentional thing but inevitably sometimes it does happen.
a lot of the show was distressing but there were some wonderful parts too. one mother spoke about how her autistic daughter loved her unconditionally whatever she did. thats so true. Riley is one of the most loving children ever. yes he can ne frustrating too but i wouldnt want him any other way.if i had a choice i wouldnt change the diagnosis.that is part of who he is and we are blessed to have two beautiful children!
hugs bell :)

saying thank you

Often in our everyday lives its easy to get so caught up in what we are doing that we never stop to acknowledge people who we probably should. On the weekend i had a lady come up to me and say thank you for taking such wonderful care of her mother. it made me realise how good it makes someone feel to just get that recognition and thanks. it isnt hard to do and it doesnt take long either. many times at work we have relatives complaining at what we didnt do rather than ever saying thank you for what we have done. sure everyone has the right to complain but its equally as easy to show gratitude too.
i am going to make a special effort to thank some people this week just to give them some recognition and let them know that they are appreciated.
on a similar note one of the boys i have been helping with his reading at school has improved so much he doesnt need m help anymore which is wonderful. His mum is actually one of the instructors at my gym and she was so proud telling me about it today. it made me feel good to knowing that the extra help has boosted his confidence and made him come along so much. so next week when i go i will have a different girl or boy to start afresh with.
well need to get onto this mountain of housework.
hugs bell :)

if only money grew on trees!

When i told the kids i was going to work on the weekend , cait asked me if i had to go couldnt i stay home with them. Once i sat down and pointed out all the activities she does and the times we do things on the weekend and when we go to the movies etc that my work pays for all of that she didnt persevere with the conversation :)
i get better money on the weekend with penatly rates and i dont need to get someone else to pick the kids up or take them to school etc so weekends are the times when extra shifts get done more often than not..but it is frustrating to have to give up that precious weekend time definately!
work has been stressful this weekend. by the end of my 4 days i could easily book myself a bed in the dementia unit. with all the yelling and acting out its like looking after kids sometimes and by the end of the day my patience is worn thin. its this fact that makes me realise i need to change careers. i am approaching burn out without a doubt and i dont want to get to that point. thank goodness my course starts soon and i will be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel!
just tomorrow and then 2 days off. working an extra shift on friday so that i can enjoy my weekend home with Jas and the kids.
i am beat and am heading to bed.
hugs bell :)

State Of Origin

State of Origin is a football series here in Australia. Its a series of three games between the state i live in now (Queensland) and the state i was born in (New South Wales). Even though i have lived here for over 15 years i still support NSW..therfore it makes me most unpopular come this time of year when i have my blue balloons and streamers out the front of the house when the rest of the street has their red ones flying..oh well..other than one person yelling out that i am a traitor havent heard much so far..i give as good as i get though so i am not worried..and if and when my team wins tonight i will rub their faces in it tomorrow!!!!!
i have had a good day today..went to body combat this morning..it is a hardcore martial arts type class.loads of kicking and punching..very good for releasing stress thats for sure. people might not like to think what is going through my head throughout the class though...people who have ticked me off feature prominently in my thoughts when i am kicking and punching :)
i went up to the kids school and did my reading support with 4 kids. it was lovely.i realy enjoy seeing them improve each week and letting them choose a cool sticker when they are done. i asked the kids last week what type of things they like so i could find some stickers for them..the girls came back with fairies and hearts etc the boys however told me horror type stickers.. i tried to explain that i didnt think mum would like them coming home with a horror sticker plastered on their uniform front. yet every week they ask me if i have found any yet!!!!!
I have no doubt that teachers have a very challenging job to do and i am certain that i dont have the patience for it on a fulltime basis but the teacher that takes the kids i read to is forever yelling at them and making derogatory comments to them which i find very hard to take. These kids are only 6-7 and they really dont need to be put down constantly and berated for the smallest things. seems to be a regular thing for this teacher who is a substitute. worries me and i thank the lord she isnt taking Riley's class thats for sure.
Rileys aide at school came to find me today to tell me how proud she was of Riley for apologising to her last week for not listening and being silly on one particular day. Once upon a time Riley was immune to others feelings completely. now he realises that every action has a reaction and it is a big thing for him to be more in tune with hurting someone elses feelings and he has really grown into such a caring person. i think he sees that trait in his sister too and it rubs off on him.
Poor Cait is sick with a cold at the moment. i suspect we may not be going to school tomorrow due to it..will see how she is feeling. wonder if little brother will try and get the day off too???
hugs bell :)

Meeting with the teacher

i meant to say before that we finally got our meeting with Riley's teacher and the special ed co-ordinator this week. i was kind of dreading it as Jason was so angry about the whole thing and i was upset..the last thing i wanted to do was to either get upset or angry and make things worse for Riley.
The main bone of contention i had was that the teachers werent letting Riley progress through the reading levels because he was having trouble retelling the story he had read or answering some of the questions. he reads really well and doesnt sound words out. he reads fluently and easily. Kids who have lots of trouble and sound out every word and take forever to read a book but can retell it were allowed to go up. i didnt think that was fair and suggested a way that i use at home to test Rileys comprehension. On the day of the meeting they tested him again using this method and he progressed 5 levels that day!!!! i dont know whether they did it to smooth things out with me or to shut me up..but needless to say that wasnt an issue anymore.
The teacher was very supportive and not defensive at all. Jason and i both kept calm and simply stated that we had high expectations for Riley regardless of his diagnosis. we didnt see the diagnosis as a reason to not expect him to do as the other kids do. that if he doesnt finish something to send it home and i will do it with him. i think we got our point across and i admit i was probably not in the right on thinking she didnt have high expectations for Riley. but i do feel like now we are on the same page and my mind is eased about my earlier concerns.
not to say that i wont be having another meeting if need be. i feel like we know our son best and we are his best advocate.
hugs bell :)